Monday, October 31, 2005

In Anticipation of a Parade and a Freaky Druid Couple

Halloween is officially upon us…no mischief last night other than the routine trashing of our family room by the two kids.

I have not only tonight's neighborhood rounds to look forward to, but also an afternoon elementary school parade. Because one bout of costuming your children isn't enough to break your basic frazzled mom...

Will the fragile tulle mermaid tail of our first grader's costume will remain intact after a brisk march around the school sidewalk? Or will our little Ariel will be trick-or-treating tonight missing a fin (shark encounter?) This is what passes for excitement in my suburban masquerade.

This year, we are blessed with sun and a high of 70 degrees, so watching the parade might actually be a pleasure. Well, make that a relative pleasure. Because I believe there is an official no-parental-relaxation zone surrounding any grade-school event.

But I'll have my lovely husband along to keep me company and, more importantly, to help carry the camera equipment.

Inevitably, there were be a last-minute jockeying for best position…someone will walk in front of us without regard just as one of our children comes into view…I will see a mom who I am supposed to know by name and I won’t even remember if her child is the classmate of my first or fourth grader…

Anyway, all the gory details will appear in this space soon. Or, if it's all really normal and boring, maybe not.

Blame any apprehension regarding this evening's neighborhood candy mission on Freaky Druid Couple.

We first encountered F.D.C. last Halloween. In the process of trick-or-treating, we came across an older man and woman wearing capes (Maybe they were supposed to be wizards? Or just wizened?) as they sat in their driveway on folding chairs.

As the children approached, F.D.C. told them that, in order to be given treats, they would need to perform -- tell a joke, sing a song...

After a few frozen seconds spent wondering if it would be considered rude to run in the other direction, I was able to suggest the chart-topping "Fly, fly witchy" and a rousing rendition earned our kids their candy (and then we ran in the other direction...okay, it was a brisk walk.)

In theory, I would wholeheartedly endorse F.D.C.'s out-of-routine request. There is nothing that annoys me more than having to dole out candy to kids who can't even manage to mutter a thank you.

But, in actuality, the command performance experience kinda creeped me out. The unexpectedness scared me. You depend on a certain Stepford sameness and then somebody goes and gets original on your ass.

So I’d probably opt to avoid this house tonight…if I could remember exactly which house it was…I mean, it was dark…I have a general idea...

Just in case, we'd better start working on our act.

Happy Hauntings!


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