Look Ma -- No Brain!

It was officially The Week Insomnia Ate My Brain. The perfect storm of a new fill-in gig, a weeknight concert, and preparing for my parent's 50th wedding anniversary party basically ripped the last shred of coherence outta my head, then whipped it up into a nice pate that was served with a side of insomnia.

If you are lucky enough to have your parents celebrate their 50th...well...it is an occasional well worth a party that would rival any wedding reception. And so that's what my siblings and I planned.

c. 1955

The celebration was a pseudo-surprise. My brother told our parents to save the date -- for a "couples colonoscopy" (evidence that everyone in the family has the same interesting sense of humor.) Being that my mom showed up in a full-length (non-hospital) gown, I don't think she fell for our cover story. (Plus, they completely neglected to drink the prep solution we so thoughtfully provided.)

August 16, 1958

A word of advice to anyone planning a similar affair: if you are stupid enough to decide to try and make a slideshow from 50 years of photos on a laptop that has a dangerously low amount of available memory...well...you will be up until 3 AM the night/morning before the party trying to burn a DVD, give up and wake up 3 1/2 hours later to complete the task (the burn ended up taking nearly 12 hours start to finish) and consequently will be even too tired to get drunk at the open bar when the party you've-been-working-on-for-weeks finally arrives.

1987

Despite my sobriety, the day was a complete success. Both Mom & Dad were beaming in typical bride and groom fashion, and Dad said it felt like the big wedding reception they never had.

Anyway, there's a lot of sentimental stuff I could write about how awfully great it is to be witness to a marriage that has lasted half a century...and a happy 50 years at that. How wonderful it was to have family and friends gathered together to commemorate that milestone without a single arrest (that I know of.) But I'll keep it simple here, and just say

Happy Anniversary Mom & Dad!

Aimee Mann!

Saw Ms. Mann last night at World Cafe Live -- a singular treat.

I'm planning a full post on the evening, eventually...with an overloaded schedule for the rest of the week, realistically it'll be awhile before I actually manage to get around to it.

In the meantime, the photo that will probably end up being my favorite (at least of the ones I took) because of that smile.

A Defining Moment in the History of Philadelphia Radio

(Not really. Just wanted to get your attention.)

So...I started doing some morning drive fill-in on Monday. (I'm not going to use names, because there is no need to sully the reputation of this particular radio station and its personnel by associating it with my blog forevermore in Google searches.)

"Ho hum," you say. Au contraire, my extremely-exclusive readers. This is quite an event, at least in the minute corner of suburbia that I call my own.

Because I am getting to broadcast out of my bedroom! Actual live terrestrial FM radio. Through the magic of a piece of equipment that I guess is usually used for station remotes, a microphone, and my trusty laptop, I am doing news and traffic Mon-Fri for a month or so while the lovely lady who usually provides this information is on maternity leave.

This is where the "magic" happens.

Broadcasting from home has been one of those cockamamie schemes I've mentioned to my boss jokingly(keep in mind that 99.9% of humor has its basis in truth) over the years; since the existence of my children has kept me from being able to work drive-time. It only took a guy who is a legendary radio personality - one of the best-known, most-widely-respected morning men in this town (and yes, John, I'm sucking up to you...but it's true)(sucking up even more!) to actually make it happen. So, I feel like a pretty lucky little reporter at this point, even with some first-day jitters and technical problems.

Still not entirely sure that I'm just not part of an elaborate hoax, and sitting here talking to myself. But (so far) my kids have not screamed at each other when I've been on the air...my kittens are being held at bay with multiple early morning feedings...and I've come pretty close to making sense with only about 4 hours of sleep the past couple nights.

And to anyone who managed to uncover this page while searching for a topless picture of me on the internet -- I swear that such a thing does not exist! (Although if you find any, let me know.)

Dwarf, Chippendales, Cockroaches

A while back, when pondering the possibility of poltergeist in my bedroom I mentioned having a photo of myself with the small-statured star of Poltergeist, Zelda Rubinstein.

Yesterday, I was scanning old photos for my parents' 50th wedding anniversary..and lo and behold, in an album from early 1988:

(An odd expression on my face...probably overwhelmed by actually standing next to someone shorter than I.) As I recall, she was a super-sweet lady.

A couple more photos from the same album:

The requisite picture with Chippendales (for whatever reason, Chippendales seemed to be the recurring theme of my late 80s-early 90s radio career. Maybe because they were an easy booking.)

Note pants of the guy on the left...1988 was big on pleats, it seems.

And then -- of course -- giant cockroaches.


The hands belonged to a guy from "Steve's Bug-Off" (I'm pretty sure it was actually "Steve" himself -- a Northeast Philadelphia exterminator who opened an "Insectarium" a few years later.) Seemed like a good way to end this post, anyway.

Back to the present --a radio first (for me) on Monday...a return to the past, with a radically new twist. Details to follow.