From the ridiculous to the sublimely ridiculous

Ridiculous news

The top story on the front page of today's Philadelphia Inquirer is all about Rock-Paper-Scissors (that's RPS to the serious devotee.) ("Step Up & Throw Down")

Evidently there is a whole psychology to the "sport."

According to the World RPS Society, your choice of throw has a deeper meaning.

Rock: Regarded as the most aggressive throw. Players are more likely to use it when they are losing.

Paper: Considered the most subtle, dignified move. It is also viewed as the weakest throw, so players often will not use it when losing.

Scissors: It represents controlled aggression. Players are more likely to use it when they are winning.

It figures the subtle and dignified move is also considered the weakest. An accurate reflection of what's wrong with our society.

http://www.worldrps.com/

http://www.northeastrpschamps.com/



Ridiculous pet couture

As seen at the Ye Olde Marlton Fall Festival last weekend -- Fifiany & Co. -- a booth dedicated to jeweled doggy collars and various other pet garb. And perhaps something for the giraffe in your life...?

(Yes, I see the stuffed cat there too, which is an insult to cats everywhere.)

A few days later, at Petsmart (buying food for my smart pets who would go on a hunger strike before wearing a chi-chi collar) I see a clothing display with a large sign overhead reading, "Dogs Need Clothes Too!"

NO. THEY DO NOT.

This is why I have cats. Because I couldn't respect an animal that would let you put a Harley Davidson cap on its head (one of the things I saw at Petsmart.) Sure, it's kinda cute in a demeaning way.

Just say you are lucky enough to actually place any sort of head gear on a cat's head. In the milliseconds before the chapeau is shaken off, kitty will give you the most pissed-off look imaginable.

And that's why I like cats.


Sublimely ridiculous scary doll

Somewhere in an upstairs closet is my Madame Alexander doll collection. When I was what is now referred to as a "tween," my mother gave me a few of the pricey dolls to reflect my heritage -- a lovely Irish lass, an Italian wench (well, she was totally un-wench-like, but I just like saying "wench") and a bride (because that is what your ordinary Italian/Irish wench-lass aspires to, of course.)

Evidently, times have changed or Madame Alexander has been hitting the vodka...or something:

And now, for your viewing pleasure the latest addition to the Madame Alexandar doll family, as displayed in the pages of the Signals catalog. THIS IS NOT A JOKE.

If it is, it is an $130+ shipping joke. There are actually miniature faux birds attacking the miniature faux fur of the miniature Tippi Hedren. (I wonder if Melanie Griffith will pick up one for her collection?)

Personally, I can't wait for the Psycho doll with its own miniature swirl of blood spiraling down a miniature drain.