Wednesday, August 31, 2005

Cars I Have Loved and Why My Husband Doesn't Need an SUV to Prove His Machismo, Volume 2

Cars I have loved #2

My second car was a brown 1973 Pontiac Lemans Sport Coupe.

I don't know if American cars were ever any larger than the ones manufactured in 1973...and the "sport" designation of this car did not infer it was anything smaller than a boat.

Despite its humongousness, it did possess a bit of style -- the hood had an interesting "v" relief (sorry for my inadequate automotive terms) and there were some really cool louvers on the side rear windows (I think this was the "sport.")

I adored this car because it had a massive V-8 engine and well, basically, because it was a piece of junk. I was working in Philadelphia and my commute involved repeated merging into hostile traffic. I was like, go ahead and hit me with your shiny BMW, see if I care!

But all was not sunny in our little love affair. For my paramour had a serious leakage problem (the seals were shot around the windshield and rear window.) Which made for damp floor mats and a high humidity level inside the vehicle.

So, on frosty mornings, I would have to scrape both the inside and outside of my windshield.
The water problem progressed to the point where I had to punch holes in the back seat floor to drain out the little ponds that would accumulate during every heavy rain.

Eventually, it all became too much to bear. I was forced to move on.

Reason #2 that my husband doesn't need an SUV to prove his machismo

The mere utterance of the words "Merchant Ivory" sends him into a period-costume-induced coma.

Is he macho or what?


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